Psalm 37 (edited for brevity)

Do not fret because of evildoers, Be not envious toward wrongdoers.

For they will wither quickly like the grass and fade like the green herb.

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.

Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He will do it.

He will bring forth your righteousness as the light and your judgment as the noonday.

Rest in the LORD and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who carries out wicked schemes.

Cease from anger and forsake wrath; do not fret; it leads only to evildoing.

For evildoers will be cut off, but those who wait for the LORD, they will inherit the land.

Yet a little while and the wicked man will be no more; and you will look carefully for his place and he will not be there.

But the humble will inherit the land and will delight themselves in abundant prosperity.

The wicked plots against the righteous and gnashes at him with his teeth.

The Lord laughs at him, for He sees his day is coming.

The wicked have drawn the sword and bent their bow to cast down the afflicted and the needy, to slay those who are upright in conduct.

Their sword will enter their own heart, and their bows will be broken.

Better is the little of the righteous than the abundance of many wicked.

For the arms of the wicked will be broken, but the LORD sustains the righteous.

The LORD knows the days of the blameless, and their inheritance will be forever.

They will not be ashamed in the time of evil, and in the days of famine they will have abundance.

But the wicked will perish; and the enemies of the LORD will be like the glory of the pastures, they vanish—like smoke they vanish away.

The wicked borrows and does not pay back, but the righteous is gracious and gives.

For those blessed by Him will inherit the land, but those cursed by Him will be cut off.

The steps of a man are established by the LORD, and He delights in his way.

When he falls, he will not be hurled headlong, because the LORD is the One who holds his hand.

I have been young and now I am old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken or his descendants begging bread.

All day long he is gracious and lends, and his descendants are a blessing.

Depart from evil and do good, so you will abide forever.

For the LORD loves justice and does not forsake His godly ones; they are preserved forever, but the descendants of the wicked will be cut off.

The righteous will inherit the land and dwell in it forever.

The mouth of the righteous utters wisdom, and his tongue speaks justice.

The law of his God is in his heart; his steps do not slip.

The wicked spies upon the righteous and seeks to kill him.

The LORD will not leave him in his hand or let him be condemned when he is judged.

Wait for the LORD and keep His way, and He will exalt you to inherit the land; when the wicked are cut off, you will see it.

I have seen a wicked, violent man spreading himself like a luxuriant tree in its native soil.

Then he passed away, and lo, he was no more; I sought for him, but he could not be found.

Mark the blameless man, and behold the upright; for the man of peace will have a posterity.

But transgressors will be altogether destroyed; the posterity of the wicked will be cut off.

But the salvation of the righteous is from the LORD; He is their strength in time of trouble.

The LORD helps them and delivers them; He delivers them from the wicked and saves them, because they take refuge in Him.

The Liza Lexicon

Eliza has a peculiar ability to change words. They come into her ears, are transferred into something different, and then are re-spoken in their made-over glory.

Now, you might say, "she's 4, it's okay for her to do that." And you would be right. However, these little verbal mishaps are extreme in their creativity, and are even more amazing considering Eliza's assurance that she is saying them correctly.

A handy list:

1- Barbie's Johnny-Q- Johnny's BBQ

2- Norfolk Jelly- New York Deli

3- Grandpa's Pond- Uncle Seth's Pond, a place we visited in Martha's Vineyard

4- The Gummy Man- the "dummy" that we saw the Coast Guard use to perform a fake rescue whilst on the Martha's Vineyard Ferry

5- Rollacoke- The World of Coke

6- Miss Jillian is "on a mission"- uttered when Miss J was out of town hooping it up with her friends, most decidedly NOT on a mission, at least not the good kind.

7- Do you buhmember?- Liza for "do you recall this certain event?"

8- Marfew's Bin-yar- Martha's Vineyard

9- This isn't a specific word, but she does have this quirky habit of calling our friends' husbands their "daddies". As in, "Miss Jillian's daddy is Mr. Drew". This confusion came about when she wondered why Jillian didn't live with her father, who resides in another state. When I explained to her that most kids grow up and move away from their parents, she was totally pumped.

"When can I do dat?" she wanted to know.

Wedgie Store

In post-birthday party letdown, as the sugar highs were dissipating, each of the Bowling Four were lounging rather complacently. Garrett was walking in circles through the living room blowing his party favor and giggling to himself.

"Emily, go sit on your brother", I suggested, in hopes to break his cycle.

Within moments, each of the children were taking turns sitting on each other, an activity that soon devolved into minor league wrestling.

As fan attendance waned, however, Louise realized she needed to ramp up the group energy.

"Daddy," (that is me, sitting on the couch watching) "you are the store, and you sell wedgies".

After a moment of continued wrestling and not much being sold at the store, Louise ran upstairs and returned with a stack of toys. "Daddy, you can sell these toys and people will pay for them with wedgies".

At this point the crowd divided into two distinct parties. Garrett and Eliza tentatively lined up at the store entrance, enticed by the toys, but hesitant about the cost of entry. Emily and Louise served as maitre d on commission, seeking to secure sales.

It took only a moment for Garrett's desire to obtain Buzz Lightyear (it's an action figure, NOT a doll) to overcome his nerves. He about-faced and was lifted off the ground, giggling throughout. Eliza, never one to be outdone, stormed in to take his place. Realizing the humor and the lack of pain, they rushed around their table, toy in one hand, ready to get in line again. They did not want their favorite toys being given to others.

The store's life was short-lived, with its founder and principle inspiration finally entering the doors and earning a toy of her own.

Americans are Oversized

On to more pressing issues:

Five-year-old Garrett weighs in at 35.5 lbs and 40.5 inches,

which puts him in the 20% in weight and 10% in height.

BUT WAIT A MINUTE...

these Imperial Growth Charts do not take into account the slighter stature of the Chinese race.

I bet he is thoroughly normal by their standards...

A quick tour through "Chinese Growth Chart" google results and I stand the proud father:

Garrett is 50% in weight and 25% in height.

Very Vaccinated

According to the documents received upon arrival, Garrett had been thoroughly shot up prior to the exchange.

BUT, once setting foot on his new native soil, those who we turn to for such guidance determined that it was best to assume he was not infected with small amounts of TB, Pox, Hep, MMR and the dreaded Tetanus (I know a guy who knew a guy whose mother told him about a boy that she knew when she was a kid who knew someone who had lock-jaw), and to pump his 21 lb soaking wet 2 1/2 year old body with infectious diseases once again. It only cost us a $25 co-pay, so the more shots you got, the better the deal.

And now, 2+ years later, in preparation for K5 this fall, Garrett once again has been pricked. He has been harried since then by a small fever while hobbling all over the house. Early assumptions that he was just milking the situation, but from all attempts to trick him into not limping have failed. I think he is sore. If I was one who gave pity to others, I might call him "pitiful". Fortunately, such considerations are not available in the Bowling house.