They tell me that one day when I'm around 12-13 that I'll discover new things about myself, changes that will both thrill me and provide reason to worry.
They didn't tell me about the change in me that happened somewhere between 7:30am and 9:30am on Tuesday, when I
started to stutter on the word 'I' (takes about 4-6 tries to get to the next word),
jump up and down a lot,
lose all sense of focus,
completely love talking with my mouth full, and
was suddenly interested in talking loudly to Mommy as often as possible
I hear my mom talking in hushed tones, comparing me to my three roommates, throwing around words like "boy" and "girl"... I'm not sure what that means, though. As long as Eliza and I get to share the Princess stuff, I'm good.
She walks in with one of those gummy sticky-but-not-sticky things you get out of the candy machine when you're with Mamma & Pappa, sitting on a platter...
"I think the jiggly things should all go to Mommy"
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"Mommy, there are two sets of letters in the alphabet that make the same sound:
C & K, and
R & W"
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"Daddy, since this carpet is not new anymore (it was installed thanks to W in July), can we eat sitting on it and not worry about dropping things" - implied goal: eat while watching a movie
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L: "We wasted money buying that Sign Language DVD because we thought Garrett couldn't hear"
E: "I told mom to wait until we got home with him."
One of the first things Garrett clung to upon his arrival at our home was plastic. May it be written that his first love was polymers. I wonder where that may lead him.
I had intended to take a picture a day for four weeks (28 total) of him holding objects. It would not have required me to give him the props, for he carried an object around in each hand the vast majority of the time he was awake (and often while asleep). It was some form of security, or excitement, and possibly merely eccentricity. However, after about two weeks, I stopped noticing this habit, and the pictures waned. And after ~5 months, he weened himself off of the objects and moved onto his 2nd love, Eliza, which in turn ebbed within the next two years.
Here are a few of the ones I found while sorting through some photos. He's growing up, and now he just holds onto his Lego men, which are much easier to conceal.
It begins with Confidence and a Friendly nature. Add Willingness... and you end up in student government and a team captain. A lot of unpaid time, but rarely stressful. 'Popularity' is a nice by-product.
Then it advances... you are Organized and Committed to seeing things through. You Finish that which is laid before you, which is so uncommon that you end up with a title and more unpaid time.
Eventually you notice people are always waiting on you to make Decisions.
"I don't know any more about this than you"
"I don't know what to do"
But it doesn't matter. They wait on you anyway.
Stress arrives in full-force, and your Level-Head continues, whatever the work is. Everything is expanding, and the challenges faced regard New Territories. Confidence comes forward, and onward we go.
Who knew going into all of this how much you can be stretched? Character becomes a centroid, an exhausting reality. Character is never satisfied with itself.
Enter dark times. Bigger than me. Bigger than anything I can grasp, control, or understand. Leadership at a level previously untested is required.
It begins with a willingness to help
Then a willingness to make decisions
to finish the tasks
to search out answers in a new world
to deal with yourself and your faults
Here I am making decisions that hurt some to protect others.
