Who Did This?

We have always been honest with Garrett of his beginnings, letting him know even before he understood its implications that he was from China, that we adopted him. And in general, all things considered, he has understood.
When he was four, he asked his mother on a road trip why his little ear (i.e. the side that is missing an ear) is different than his big one. He had recognized and verbalized that he had only one ear. Maggie told him that one day he would get a 2nd big ear to replace his little one.
Well, that day came yesterday, thanks to the good effort of Dr. Jones and his staff.

An extra shout out goes to Dr. Jones for going to the mattresses with the insurance company that had determined the first 2 rounds of review that Garrett receiving hearing on the left side of his head was not considered medically necessary, and was a 'cosmetic' procedure, not to be covered by them. After Dr. Jones climbed the ladder to the state insurance commission, the insurance company's perspective changed.

Garrett became the 3rd Adam, with Dr. Jones removing a portion of his rib to carve an ear and insert it in the side of his head in the first of 4 surgeries to gain his hearing.
G-man has had a few other surgeries, and has always proven completly brave about the process. This time was no different, coupling his natural bravery with an intense excitement over the new ear. However, upon waking up, bandages wrapped over his head, tubes draining various-colored fluids from random body parts, and a covering over his rib, all bets were off. In a drowsy, dry-mouthed manner, upon the entrance of Dr. Jones into the post-op room, Garrett strains with all the drugged-up voice he can muster, "WHO DID THIS!" while holding his rib. Direct and distinct accusation in his voice.

Hoodwinked.

Shanghai'd

Trusting an Untrustworthy Person

I'm not a hawk, and I even think kimchi is almost edible. But why do we continue to trust North Korea?
A shortened recent history:

• 1992 & 1994: Kim says "we'll be nice". 
• 1995: US gives $6B to pay for them being nice. 
• 2002: Kim says "just kidding, we've got an underground nuclear facility". 
• 2003: Invite Russia and China to help broker peace. Really?
• 2005: Kim says "we'll be nice, if you give us some more $"
• 2006: Kim 1st nuclear weapon test.
• 2007: Kim says "we'll disable our nuclear facilities by year end... got any more $"
• 2008: US agrees to take NKorea off its "Axis of Evil" list, if NKorea gives them access to all of the nuclear facilities for inspection (notice, the 2007 deadline was missed).
• 2008: NKorea agrees to give US access to all nuclear facilities for inspection, if the US gives more $.
• 2009: NKorea walks away from talks, tests another nuclear weapon, and then agrees to resume nuclear disarmament talks (apparently, they didn't want to be in the talks while testing the nuclear weapon, as that would be disingenuous)
• 2010: NKorea sinks a SKorea ship, threatens SKorea and US with nuclear war, then asks to resume nuclear disarmament talks
• 2011: NKorea reveals another secret underground nuclear facility which they had been constructing while they've been negotiating.
• 2012 April 14: NKorea attempts to honor the late Kim's 70th birthday and his eternal father's 100th birthday:

The event was appropriate: to celebrate their dead, dishonest and militaristic cult-leader who used his tax base to fund the military while insisting that foreign aid be used to feed the citizens, the cult-followers attempted to launch a long-range rocket to show the world its power and instead watched the rocket fail.

Maybe we can get NKorea to commit to nuclear disarmament talks if we give them some $.

Glass Jaw

Tonight I had the occasion amidst my weekly soccer match of going after a loose ball in front of the goal, whereby I met the other team's striker, my keeper, and my keeper's elbow. Me the elbow were intimately acquainted, and I awoke inside the penalty box 5-10 seconds later. 

I left the field of my own accord and watched the remainder of the game. Two concerns evolved in my mind, one of greater weight than the other. First, I couldn't close my mouth. Second, I would have to share said reality with my wife (I'll let you decide which of the concerns concerned me the most).

An hour of internet [sic] research has encouraged me to join the Waitansee Tribe in the hopes that things are better tomorrow. And seeing as though Maggie is table dancing in Vegas with her girlfriends for the weekend, I'm going to delay the inevitable. 

Mars vs. Venus

At supper tonight Eliza and Garrett proceeded to share their individual dreams. These are not the dreams of the future, but rather the Sunday-afternoon napping with the mouth half open and drool christening the pillow dreams of childhood. I'll let them speak for themselves:

Eliza: "I dreamed that we were playing on [the neighbors] trampoline, and then I came inside and Emily was in there because they [the neighbors, who shall remain nameless, to protect the innocent] didn't want to play with her anymore. And then I took her outside and we all became friends again and played together."

Garrett: "I was walking in the woods, and then someone came out with a sword, and then I beat him. I pressed a button, got into a helicopter, and then another guy shot a string up at me [interpret: zip line], and when he got into the helicopter I pressed a button, and then the helicopter blew up and I jumped out and landed on a motorcycle and pressed a button, and rode away."

Lost in Translation

Eliza's best friend and beau apparent is her young partner in crime Jackson (think Bonnie and Clyde, and then pray things turn out better for these two). While picking Eliza up from the Remec neighbors, the school day's events were downloaded to the adult moms.

Fellow kindergartener Mera Remec shares the day's drama: "Dobby got hit and had to get stitches."
Eliza breaks in, "Yeah, Jackson hit Dobby with a brick at recess."
At which point, Mera exclaims, "Eliza! It's not Dobby! It's Dobby!"
"That's what I said," Eliza responds, "Dobby got hit in the head with a brick."

What Eliza heard:
Mera:  "Dobby got hit and had to get stitches."
Eliza:  "Yeah, Jackson hit Darby with a brick at recess."
Mera:  "Eliza! It's not Dobby! It's Dobby!"
Eliza:  "That's what I said, Darby got hit in the head with a brick."

What Mera heard:
Mera:  "Darby got hit and had to get stitches."
Eliza:  "Yeah, Jackson hit Dobby with a brick at recess.
Mera:  "Eliza! It's not Darby! It's Dobby!"
Eliza:  "That's what I said, Dobby got hit in the head with a brick."

The adults were confused regarding the conflicting conversation amongst their kindergarteners, not realizing Darby's real name (and understanding the nuances of the conversation) until they met his mother a few days later.